Levi has only a passing relationship with sleep. On good nights, he may manage a handful of hours, but anything more than two feels like a strange accomplishment. Even before being dragged from the underground, insomnia had needed little help to take hold of him at night, but the past several years have provided it with an endless source of fuel. In the darkening hours, his conversation with Erwin echoes in his head. Perhaps it had been futile to try convincing him to stay behind. But even though the strength of Erwin's convictions had swayed him, as they did nearly without fail, Levi cannot help the trepidation that has lodged itself in his chest, heavy and dull. For all that death was always a real possibility for any of them when facing down titans, Erwin's chances of surviving the mission to retake Shiganshina are especially slim.
Doubt is more powerful when one is alone, its claws sharper and longer, looking for a foothold for fear. But fear is familiar, and easier to set aside for later. Later, when whatever will happen has happened. For now, there is still a chance. A chance, and hope. And underneath hope, deeply buried, a wish.
For just a moment, he closes his eyes, sighing to lean back into his chair, not expecting sleep.
---
[1] Waking up in an unfamiliar place when your understanding of your own world is so limited is especially unnerving, but even more so to find a note claiming that he has ostensibly agreed (bullshit) to live there indefinitely. Confusion and heat making him irritable, Levi mutters a string of profanity under his breath as he gathers up the few things apparently left for him (very nearly dumping out the very suspicious-looking vial of colored liquid, but deciding to hold onto it for later). He feels oddly extra vulnerable without his gear, or even any sort of weapon at all, but he can't do anything about it by staying where he is. Carefully folding his cloak under his arm, and leaves the garden as quickly as possible looking for answers.
What he gets, stepping out into an entirely foreign world, is more questions. With no one and nothing familiar in sight, he strides up to the nearest person, a veritable storm cloud, and demands:
"Hey - what the fuck is going on?"
[2]
After getting a general account of this new place and circumstance (much of which is difficult to accept as real, except for the fact that he barely sleeps and barely dreams outside of nightmares), Levi manages to find refuge in a shaded area not completely occupied by others. He isn't managing to conceal that he isn't handling the heat well, jacket removed and folded in with the dark green cloak, the sleeves of his uniform rolled up to his elbows, cravat removed and collar buttons undone. It's an exceedingly dressed-down look for him, but it's all the choice he has, short of stripping - and while that isn't necessarily off the table, it would just be more stuff to carry.
He finally drinks the water given when he'd first arrived (having been assured that it's normal water, even though he still has suspicions), and side-glances at someone nearby.
"Is the weather in this weird-ass place always this shitty?"
So Take Off All Your Clothes |
It's more the rumors about a hole in the wall rather than the beach itself that have piqued his suspicious curiosity, but he finds himself there even in the melting heat. The wall itself seemed rather ordinary; short and rather pointless, especially if it crumbled so easily. But in a place that evidently had no monstrous titans to worry about, their walls apparently had no real meaning.
No - that isn't true. Walls are built for a reason.
He shelves that mystery for later, drawn inevitably to the water itself. There's the urge to take his boots off, to experience the sensation of sand and water, but it's still tempered by wariness. Even so, he walks down to the edge of the waterline, transfixed by it all - the waves as they curl up and the sound of their rhythmic breaking over the shore, the endless blue, stretching out to one single, neat horizon line. Levi stares out at the novel sight for a long time, seemingly lost in thought.
Though not so lost that he still doesn't neatly dodge out of the way when an over-zealous frolicker nearly knocks into him, landing flat on their own ass in the sand. The momentum manages to fling up just enough to sprinkle him with sandy water, and Levi wrinkles his nose as he flicks it off his clothes and fixes the offender with an affronted glare.
"Watch where you're going."
A Suspicious Message |
My actions killed my friends.
Wildcard | Feel free to hit me with other starters!
Levi is an old muse I've revived recently I'm still stretching his legs a bit, so please forgive any potential wobbliness. For general reference, I've pulled him from a midpoint in canon (~chapter 72). I prefer to write in prose but brackets are OK.
DM me on the journal here or find me at lavellalalan
Levi | Attack on Titan | New Player
Levi has only a passing relationship with sleep. On good nights, he may manage a handful of hours, but anything more than two feels like a strange accomplishment. Even before being dragged from the underground, insomnia had needed little help to take hold of him at night, but the past several years have provided it with an endless source of fuel. In the darkening hours, his conversation with Erwin echoes in his head. Perhaps it had been futile to try convincing him to stay behind. But even though the strength of Erwin's convictions had swayed him, as they did nearly without fail, Levi cannot help the trepidation that has lodged itself in his chest, heavy and dull. For all that death was always a real possibility for any of them when facing down titans, Erwin's chances of surviving the mission to retake Shiganshina are especially slim.
Doubt is more powerful when one is alone, its claws sharper and longer, looking for a foothold for fear. But fear is familiar, and easier to set aside for later. Later, when whatever will happen has happened. For now, there is still a chance. A chance, and hope. And underneath hope, deeply buried, a wish.
For just a moment, he closes his eyes, sighing to lean back into his chair, not expecting sleep.
---
[1]
Waking up in an unfamiliar place when your understanding of your own world is so limited is especially unnerving, but even more so to find a note claiming that he has ostensibly agreed (bullshit) to live there indefinitely. Confusion and heat making him irritable, Levi mutters a string of profanity under his breath as he gathers up the few things apparently left for him (very nearly dumping out the very suspicious-looking vial of colored liquid, but deciding to hold onto it for later). He feels oddly extra vulnerable without his gear, or even any sort of weapon at all, but he can't do anything about it by staying where he is. Carefully folding his cloak under his arm, and leaves the garden as quickly as possible looking for answers.
What he gets, stepping out into an entirely foreign world, is more questions. With no one and nothing familiar in sight, he strides up to the nearest person, a veritable storm cloud, and demands:
"Hey - what the fuck is going on?"
[2]
After getting a general account of this new place and circumstance (much of which is difficult to accept as real, except for the fact that he barely sleeps and barely dreams outside of nightmares), Levi manages to find refuge in a shaded area not completely occupied by others. He isn't managing to conceal that he isn't handling the heat well, jacket removed and folded in with the dark green cloak, the sleeves of his uniform rolled up to his elbows, cravat removed and collar buttons undone. It's an exceedingly dressed-down look for him, but it's all the choice he has, short of stripping - and while that isn't necessarily off the table, it would just be more stuff to carry.
He finally drinks the water given when he'd first arrived (having been assured that it's normal water, even though he still has suspicions), and side-glances at someone nearby.
"Is the weather in this weird-ass place always this shitty?"
So Take Off All Your Clothes |
It's more the rumors about a hole in the wall rather than the beach itself that have piqued his suspicious curiosity, but he finds himself there even in the melting heat. The wall itself seemed rather ordinary; short and rather pointless, especially if it crumbled so easily. But in a place that evidently had no monstrous titans to worry about, their walls apparently had no real meaning.
No - that isn't true. Walls are built for a reason.
He shelves that mystery for later, drawn inevitably to the water itself. There's the urge to take his boots off, to experience the sensation of sand and water, but it's still tempered by wariness. Even so, he walks down to the edge of the waterline, transfixed by it all - the waves as they curl up and the sound of their rhythmic breaking over the shore, the endless blue, stretching out to one single, neat horizon line. Levi stares out at the novel sight for a long time, seemingly lost in thought.
Though not so lost that he still doesn't neatly dodge out of the way when an over-zealous frolicker nearly knocks into him, landing flat on their own ass in the sand. The momentum manages to fling up just enough to sprinkle him with sandy water, and Levi wrinkles his nose as he flicks it off his clothes and fixes the offender with an affronted glare.
"Watch where you're going."
A Suspicious Message |
My actions killed my friends.
Wildcard |
Feel free to hit me with other starters!
Levi is an old muse I've revived recently I'm still stretching his legs a bit, so please forgive any potential wobbliness. For general reference, I've pulled him from a midpoint in canon (~chapter 72). I prefer to write in prose but brackets are OK.
DM me on the journal here or find me at